You stitched, sculpted, sobbed, and sparkled. These are the champions of the chaos…
👑 TOP SPARKLERS 👑
🧵 Kath (Katy’s Kwilts & Teddy Bears) – The Glitterless Queen of Colour
Unleashed a felt bear, a Christmas panel in September, AND a golden Dresden like it was nothing.
Then casually said “no thanks” to glitter, started a neutral colour crusade, and still ruled the leaderboard.
“Anything that is neutral… unless it’s to offset BRIGHT 😂”
🛍️ Carol (Roberts Homewares) – The Shed Strategist
Conquered market days, hid stock in a glitter-proof shed, whispered emoji thank-yous, and kept climbing with quiet festive menace.
“I just had to go with the flow and work with it.”
📦 Joanna (Charms by Joanna) – The Angel General
Delivered hundreds of handmade angels to NHS staff, shared soul-shattering commissions, and accidentally received TEN THOUSAND WINGS.
“They are our NHS angels.”
📝 Gillian (Daisy Chain Gifts) – The Glitter Court Judge
Declared official Guild bans on distressing furniture, embellishment overload, and rogue Spanish moss.
Also lost an entire jar of glue sticks to a craft-based conspiracy.
“It’s a conspiracy! I feel cleansed!”
✨ SPECIAL MENTIONS ✨
🐉 Ceri (Dragons of Shropshire) – Mythmaker of Shropshire
Dropped dragons, baby snails, and triggered a full guild spiral over missing ears. Again.
🌼 Fran (The Felt Petal Shop) – Felt Fae of BloomFest
Summoned pinecones. Built a hoop wreath so powerful it warped the season. Autumn bows before her.
🌈 Linda (LindaS Art Glass) – Pub Window Witch
Installed an entire stained-glass zoo in a Derbyshire pub and then low-key spied on it with a coffee. Icon behaviour.
🕯️ Jim (Sweet Aroma’s) – Candle Alchemist
Crafted a birthday cake candle so convincing he had to ban spoons.
Then dropped EU wax law and failed Easter chicks. We were never the same.
🖋️ Elisabeth (Lissie’s Poems) – Compliment Sorceress
Left just one beautifully gentle “These are stunning x” and the algorithm glowed with poetic peace.
🌈 EVERYONE ELSE WHO BROUGHT THE GLITTER 🌈
💬 Chiara – Returned with love, left us in tears.
🖼️ Ro – Quiet golden queen of keepsakes.
🐑 Kath & Gill again – For leaning all the way into wrong answers (ASDA?? A EWE??)
The glitter has spoken. The crowns have landed. The scroll is sealed.
Next week: new chaos, new sparkle, new legends.
Author: Anna
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